Pregnancy can bring feelings you never expected. You might be absolutely thrilled to be pregnant and still feel frightened about what could happen. You might find yourself checking symptoms, worrying between appointments or struggling to enjoy the pregnancy. And sometimes the pregnancy itself isn't what you imagined it would be. It may be physically difficult, medically complicated, emotionally overwhelming or simply different from the picture you had in your head.

Pregnancy after loss can bring another layer of complexity. A rainbow pregnancy can be deeply wanted and incredibly precious, while also bringing fear, hypervigilance and intrusive thoughts. You may find yourself comparing this pregnancy with a previous one, worrying about reaching certain milestones or wanting to feel a certain way about the pregnancy.

Sometimes you need somewhere to talk through what is happening, particularly when you feel you should be enjoying it or feel guilty for having difficult feelings about something you have wanted for so long.

Below are some of the reasons people may seek counselling during pregnancy. For you, it could be something completely different. Please contact me for an initial conversation if you’d like to explore working together.

• Anxiety and excessive worrying during pregnancy

• Pregnancy after miscarriage, stillbirth or baby loss

• Rainbow pregnancy and the fear of something going wrong

• Intrusive and unwanted thoughts

• Anxiety between scans and antenatal appointments

• Difficult or unexpected scan results

• High-risk or complicated pregnancy

• Pregnancy following fertility treatment or IVF

• Mixed or unexpected feelings about being pregnant

• Feeling disconnected from your pregnancy or your baby

• Changes to your body and how you feel about yourself

• Fear of childbirth

• Previous traumatic pregnancy or birth experiences

• Anxiety about becoming a parent

• Relationship difficulties during pregnancy

• Feeling overwhelmed by the changes pregnancy is bringing

• Processing a pregnancy that is very different from what you expected

• Making sense of difficult decisions during pregnancy

You may feel excited about meeting your baby while also feeling anxious about giving birth. You might be worried about pain, medical intervention, losing control, not being listened to, or something happening to you or your baby. If you have given birth before, a difficult experience can affect how you feel about another pregnancy or birth.

Birth partners can also be affected by what they witnessed or experienced. Whether you are preparing for birth or trying to make sense of what happened afterwards, counselling can give you a clear, supportive space to talk things through and feel more confident about moving forward.

• Anxiety or fear about giving birth

• Preparing emotionally for a first birth

• Anxiety about a subsequent birth

• A previous difficult or traumatic birth

• Feeling frightened, powerless or out of control during birth

• Feeling unheard or not listened to by healthcare professionals

• A birth that did not go according to your wishes or expectations

• Emergency caesarean or instrumental birth

• Unexpected medical intervention or complications

• Difficult or distressing memories of birth

• Replaying or thinking repeatedly about what happened

• Feeling that your birth experience has been minimised by others

• Feelings of guilt, anger, sadness or disappointment about your birth

• Difficulty coming to terms with what happened

• Anxiety about becoming pregnant or giving birth again after a difficult experience

• Preparing for a planned caesarean or other birth following a previous difficult experience

• Processing the emotional impact of a difficult recovery after birth

• A difficult or distressing experience of witnessing a partner's birth

• Feeling helpless or frightened while supporting someone during labour or birth

• Distressing memories following your partner's or baby's birth

• Anxiety, guilt or difficulty processing what happened as a birth partner or dad

Loving your baby doesn’t mean you’ll love every part of being a parent. Maybe becoming a parent hasn’t felt quite how you imagined it would. You might love your baby deeply and still feel overwhelmed, exhausted, anxious, lonely or unlike yourself. The newborn days can be intense, particularly when you’re recovering from birth, dealing with hormonal changes, broken sleep and the constant demands of caring for someone who needs you. Perhaps you’re finding that anxiety, low mood or intrusive thoughts are becoming harder to manage. Sometimes the thoughts and feelings can be frightening or difficult to talk about, particularly when you feel you’re supposed to be enjoying this time.

Parenthood can also change far more than your relationship with your baby. Your relationship with your partner may feel different, and relationships with family and friends can change too. You might feel judged, overwhelmed by other people’s opinions or find yourself struggling with boundaries. Perhaps you’re adjusting to life in a blended family, becoming a step parent, welcoming another baby or trying to meet the different needs of children at different stages. The excitement of a new baby can eventually give way to the everyday reality of parenting, and you may find yourself wondering where you fit into all of this. What you expected parenthood to be and what you are actually experiencing may feel very different.

There can be good days and really difficult days, sometimes within the same week or even the same day. You can love your child and still miss your old life. You can feel grateful for your family and still feel that you’re struggling. You don’t have to be completely overwhelmed before reaching out for support, and you don’t need to have everything worked out before you get in touch. Counselling can give you somewhere to talk honestly about how parenthood is really feeling for you, without judgement or the pressure to pretend that everything is fine.

Counselling around parenthood can help with:

• Difficult emotional adjustment after birth
• Postnatal anxiety and postnatal depression
• Intrusive thoughts and frightening thoughts after having a baby
• Feeling overwhelmed, exhausted or unlike yourself
• Adjusting to your new role as a parent
• Expectations of parenthood not matching reality
• Changes in your relationship with your partner
• Changes in relationships with family and friends
• Difficulties with boundaries or unwanted advice from others
• Adjusting to a blended family or becoming a step parent
• Adjusting to a growing family or welcoming another baby
• Parenting challenges and feeling unsure of yourself
• Missing your old life or struggling with changes to your identity
• Feeling isolated or finding friendships have changed
• Guilt, anger, sadness, resentment or feeling that you should be coping better